You have to hand it to the British. They knew how to make a romance happen. Not only were marriages arranged, but families even forced their strapping sons and debutante daughters to get together for tea, dancing and escorting around town. Oh sure, it resulted in many loveless marriages of convenience, but at least the younglings learned a thing or two about communication with the opposite sex!
Today, when it comes to dating women, we no longer have arranged marriages, which is definitely a good thing. However, as a society, we have regressed in our ability to communicate with strangers. There is no formal arrangement. There is no one looking out for us, trying to match make. Everyone give to have the same piece of advice: “Go out start dating women and find what you’re looking for!” The average man says to himself, “Great…but how do I get started?”
Case in point: a good looking but shy guy sees an attractive woman in the store. He ponders on whether he should go and say hello. He panics, not having the foggiest notion of what to say. The second time he meets her, he does work up the courage to speak, but gets nervous and makes the conversation boring. Naturally, the woman has no positive association with her new friend, and will probably relegate him to the role of friend or acquaintance.
When dating women, try to keep in mind both a male and female perspective. The male perspective is that you see someone you like and want to make a new friend. The female perspective is this: that you want to meet someone special, and feel something strong. In other words, have a strategy beyond awkward introductions.
How do people improve relationships in general? They converse about things they have in common, they laugh and joke, they exchange intelligent commentary. If you want to avoid the stigma of being just a friend when dating women, then you must embrace romantic feelings and not shy away from what you want.
After you exchange some pleasantries and make plans to speak again, be careful not to come on too strong. Allow the woman to have her space. Give her time to think about you. This lesson applies equally to women. When you allow someone their personal space, you benefit from that person’s positive association. She will start to desire your company in her life.
By taking on a male and female perspective, you will start to understand the many common mistakes that are made in modern dating. For more dating tips, talk to a relationship guru who can help you sort out your life!